Your Loneliness Isn't Your Fault (Take 2)

Your loneliness isn't your fault. You are not ugly, you are not a bad person and you are not "undatable". If you actually look at all the people who are complaining about their lack of a love life, and compare to the ones who are in loving relationships, you will realize that there is often no pattern, no rhyme or reason for why some people have it and others don't.

The problem isn't just that you in particular can't find love, it's also that those who would love you if they knew you can't find you. Because without the community infrastructure, the social connections and networks to point us in the right direction and help narrow the search, we're all looking for a needle in a haystack!

For the most part that infrastructure just doesn't exist right now. In its place we have dating apps, which are terrible at helping people find compatible matches because they're software and not human beings. The software doesn't understand human beings well enough to understand what we need out of our relationships and who we would enjoy and fit with best.

You deserve to be loved, and there are many compatible people out there who you could find happiness with if only you could find each other. But right now whether you find each other or not is dependent on an unfair lottery. The odds of your finding each other are often very slim. Improving yourself, your appearance or the way you interact with others may have very little impact on those odds if at all.

We need to bring back human matchmaking. Fill out this quiz and share your answers with a trusted friend or community member. Have them recommend people to date or others who can give you recommendations.

Please share this message and the quiz with all your friends. We can make the world a more loving place.

Thank you.

Yoda Speaks on the Great Balancing Act

Ignorance leads to distrust. Distrust leads to fear. Fear leads to preemptive strikes. Preemptive strikes lead to death or subjugation, which leads to cycles of vengeance.

But forced to work together many tribes are, when one tribe subjugates the rest. Working together leads to trade, trade leads to alliances, alliances lead to friendship and love, which leads to a new generation growing up without remembering their hatred of each other, which leads to peace, which leads to foundational stability to build new infrastructure upon. For the good of all such infrastructure is.

Then has children the new generation does. History these children remember not. Not the toil their ancestors endured. Not the cost of infrastructure built. Complacent they become.

Locally met all needs are, or so they think. But if locally met all needs are, then needed outsiders are not.

Fade their trade relationships do. Loss of trade leads to loss of communal bonds. Loss of those bonds leads to loss of contact, loss of contact leads to loss of understanding, loss of understanding leads to ignorance...

But inevitable this was not. Continued living and growing, continued building civilization higher they could have. But only if lived longer they had–the generations whose ancestors' toil they remembered. Or if, to their children, imparted more their ancestors had. Or if to teach and learn from each other more efficiently, those children had learned. Rebuild they could have, before the last bricks of civilization fell.

A mistake every fall is. A mistake every death is. Part of life mistakes are. Learn from them we must, to become stronger, to make fewer mistakes. Or else perish we all will, with no one left to carry on.

The Great Balancing Act, Life and Civilization are.